My baby could not stop breastfeeding!

I had planned that when my baby gets to one year and three months,  I would conceive so that by the time she is two years I could have another baby. When I was breastfeeding her I never got my periods, so in a way breastfeeding worked for me as a family planning method. She loved breastfeeding so much that it almost became an obsession. The older she grew, the more attached she became to the breast.

I wanted to stop her from breastfeeding, but I kept postponing because she really loved the breast. I kept breastfeeding and my husband would ask when I would ever stop, because he wanted another baby.

When Jemimah was one year and five months old, I thought I should seriously start thinking about weaning her, because, to the best of my knowledge, I could only get pregnant if she stopped breastfeeding.

At that time, I began feeling as if something was wrong with my tummy. I would feel a cramp which was somewhat hard. I sought my friends’ opinion about it, but their suppositions and advice were so divergent that I decided to see my gynaecologist. He asked me to give him a brief account of my lifestyle, from the day my daughter was delivered till then.

I had not visited my gynaecologist for almost a year, and I asked him whether it was normal to stay that long without menses. He asked me several questions and then ran some tests. He told me all seemed well with me, but asked me to do a pregnancy test. I was surprised and asked him if it was possible for one to get pregnant, while still breastfeeding and without ever having periods.

He told me he could not answer my question until the results of the pregnancy test were out. I went to the laboratory, did the test and the results were positive. I was pregnant!

It was a welcome result because I had wanted to get pregnant, but faced difficulty in trying to get my daughter off the breast. I consulted a few women who told me that I could not breastfeed when I was pregnant. I sought my doctor’s advice and he told me not to stop Jemimah’s breastfeeding immediately, for I needed to prepare her as well as prepare myself.

I breastfed Jemimah for another one month and then I took her to my mum’s place. It was the most painful thing for me, but the only way out. I left her there and went back home crying. We were very close and that was the first time we were separated. It was horrible and even worse for my husband, who took us there but could not wait for us because he did not want to see what would happen. A man seated next to me in a taxi kept asking me why I was crying.

A week later, I went to check on her. When she saw me, she hugged me and her hand went straight to the breast. I consulted with my mum, and she told me to leave Jemimah with her for another week. I went back home alone. When I returned two weeks later, she still demanded the breast but this time, I could not leave her. I decided to go with her because I was getting lonely.

At home, she cried for three consecutive nights as I watched, torn between taking her back to the breast and leaving her to cry. I knew if I took her back to the breast, I would never be able to stop her. It is now two months since I completely stopped her from breastfeeding, and she is getting used to it.

When I told my husband that I was pregnant, he asked me very many questions. He wanted to know how many months the pregnancy was, but I had no idea as I did not know exactly when I conceived. I had to take an ultrasound scan after two weeks so as to determine how long I had been pregnant — the scan indicated it was two and a half months.

I think morning sickness is psychological because over those two months I had none of it, but only two days after I knew I was pregnant, morning nausea pounced on me!

Why some babies get addicted to the breast — While others want out…

Additional information by Paediatrician Adelaide Kituyi

Why is it difficult for some children to stop breastfeeding?

In many cases, emotional attachment to the mother, is a key contributor to some baby’s refusal to stop breastfeeding. Some children breastfeed until they are five years old. In essence, breastfeeding at that age Is just for comfort, not necessarily hunger. The older some babies grow, the more attached they become to the breast.

When should one stop her baby from breastfeeding?

Majority of babies stop breastfeeding when they are about two years old, which is safe. Medically there is no specific time to stop breastfeeding, even if the mother is pregnant. The hormones of pregnancy may reduce the amount of milk available. However, some mothers continue breastfeeding their children during pregnancy and even after delivery, they continue breastfeeding the two babies, especially in cases where the mother conceived when the first baby was still very young.

Why do some babies refuse to breastfeed?

Most of the babies who refuse to breastfeed early do so because they have been introduced to some other feeding methods. If a baby is exclusively breastfeeding, they are not likely to stop breastfeeding just like that. However, babies who have been introduced early to a feeding bottle tend to refuse the breast.

During infancy, mothers are discouraged from using feeding bottles, because the baby is likely to develop a condition known as nipple confusion. The milk from a bottle flows immediately a baby starts suckling. With the breast, however, the baby has to suckle for a few moments before milk starts flowing.

Once the baby gets accustomed to the relatively easily accessible bottle milk, she may not want to go back to the breast where she has to work a little bit harder before the milk comes. If a baby is exclusively breastfeeding, there should be no reason why they should stop breastfeeding early.

Is it advisable to introduce a water bottle to an infant?

Ideally, one should try to avoid introducing the feeding bottle from the beginning because breast milk has all the nutrients a baby needs including water. Mothers should avoid giving their babies glucose water because it makes the baby feel full and yet it is not nutritionally adequate.

What should one do if a child refuses to breastfeed?

If this occurs at an early age, the mother should try expressing the milk and feeding the baby on that milk. Breastfeeding is necessary in stimulating the flow of milk. The best approach is to desist from introducing feeds other than breast milk, so that the baby does not get confused. A mother who is facing difficulty in breastfeeding can consult her healthcare provider or if these are available at a nearby hospital, attend pre-lactation classes, where advice on exclusive breastfeeding is given.

If a baby refuses to breastfeed, does that imply that the mother’s milk is bad?

No. The mother’s milk cannot be bad unless the mother has breast abscess, which is accumulation of pus in the breast. Even if the mother is ill and she is not on any medication contraindicated with breastfeeding, she should continue to breastfeed.

If you are unwell while still breastfeeding, ensure you inform your healthcare provider of this fact, so as to ensure only drugs that are safe during breastfeeding are prescribed.

END:BL 09/60-61